Black cab slang! A quick guide...

So there I was cruising down Kensington road late one night in me sherbert when all of a sudden I've noticed good ol’ bertie had just popped! And there were penguins everywhere, as far as the eye could see. So I’ve slammed me anchors on and picked up a cock & hen on holiday from stateside, and they ask me to take them to the gas chamber. Being the gentlemen I am, I obliged of course, and on forth we went. Get there though, and they only bilked me didn’t they! I know I am but a butterboy and all that, how anyone would have read that happening, I don’t know! Sounding like more like an excerpt from a clockwork orange than a conversation a typical cabbie may have, the culture and slang around the cab trade is as elaborate and in depth as the 362 year history of the trade that predates it. Stemming from and adopting all the cultures that have made up the demographic of drivers over the years, from jewish to cockney rhyming and polish even, every culture has left it’s mark, and will continue to do so for years to come. Here’s a few terms, just get to you started. Butterboy – What I am technically, the origins of the term are largely up for debate, but it’s slang for someone who’s fresh and only just completed the infamous knowledge of london test (takes 3-5 years usually). Butterboy = But a boy, and this status basically gives any of the old boys free reign to dress you down for doing things you perhaps shouldn’t (overtaking a cab with his light on, picking up near a rank, stuff like that). It’s a rights of passage, and until my badge number dictates, a butterboy is what I am. Bertie’s Popped – Bertie’s old english slang for Albert, and this is in reference to the royal albert hall having just burst. The greatest thing an Albert was named after I reckon, we won’t talk about the others. Manners don’t permit it! Penguins – People in tuxedos, always love a black cab ride to a station or home to Notting hill. Can either be the most politely spoken or just not worth the hassle, depends on how many cocktails and they’ve and an how far up the aristocratic chain they go I guess. (I kid, they’re mostly alright to be fair, even if they do talk like Major from Fawlty Towers. “What’s that you say cabbie? The GERMANS are coming?!”) Sherbert - Sherbet dab. Cockney rhyming slang for cab. Bilked – When someone does a runner. I think it’s from jewish origins, but I could be wrong. I haven’t had one yet, but I’ve heard all sorts of funny stories from mates, the funniest being when a little yewtdem rudeboy tried being clever on a fare to bayswater. The driver involved (who I won’t name for legal reasons) lives in Essex, which is a good 40-50 miles away depending on the area. The thing that a lot of people don’t know is that unless we take the foot off the brake when we stop, no one’s going anywhere. So this young teen has tried his luck and come undone! The drivers locked the doors, turned off the intercom and drove home without a second thought. Good hour and a half away too. Now this guy is in bits in the back, begging the driver to stop, pleading for mercy and apologising. It was all in vain, he dropped him off in Rainham in the end with no trains running and on a Sunday too. Some lessons in life are easy, others, well… It’s the mistakes we make that define us. ;) The maddest story I’ve heard is of a cabbie picking someone up a barrister from the Royal courts of justice, wig on and everything, only to have him run like linford christie at the other end. Strange old game... Sports direct/the gas chamber – Euston station. It’s known as sports direct. Why? ‘cause that’s all the cabbies that work it ever wear. Good ol’ Dunlop Dave and Lonsdale Leonard. Like most major stations, each have a particular group or “mob” that use it to socialise rather than work, and this station in particular has a reputation for the more, shall we say, ‘casually dressed’ of cabbies. In terms of the gas chamber, the rank is located in the basement of the station, so when you have 20-30 diesel chugging cabs (not for much longer, brand spanking new electric cab coming out next year, making london the first city to have a taxi fleet that is ZEC…), you’ll see why it gets that name. That’s all for now. The origins of sayings and slang (of which there are hundreds if not thousands within the trade) are unbeknown to me. I’m not a curator, merely a butter boy still finding his legs but don't worry, I'll be sharing more phrases as I hear them. 

On a twitter group I'm on, a pissed off cabbie who didn't have a glossary at hand once asked “seriously lads, do we have to talk in riddles all the time on here? I'm using this for actual work updates FFS!". Another cabbie simply replied “yeah, but it aint as funny is it?” And that’s probably the best justification for slang I’ve ever heard. It just makes life that bit more colourful. 

Be lucky folks. ;D